Notable things that happened tonight:

-landed a frontside 180 over this curb drop gap thing

-really drunk lady from trailer park yelled at us because she had to drive "80 miles! One way!" tomorrow. I replied with, "sorry, we'll leave" and she just repeated her whole slurred spiel three times after I said, "sorry, we'll leave" after each time.

-some kid asked me for a ride. Later some of his friends who were high came out and he started telling them about how he had just gotten caught robbing some store and the cop dropped him off at Maverik and took his keys and how yesterday he had broken into a van and stolen money and found a bag of pot, etc. At this point I was thinking, I don't want to give this kid a ride. So me and my friends stalled for a while and I tried to get one of them to ride with me just in case he tried something fishy but none of them would, but luckily one of his friends pulled into Maverik and he got a ride with him.

-I pulled a muscle in my butt.

All of these things took place in the street of a trailer park. Well the frontside 180 began in the street of the trailer park and ended in the adjacent parking lot.

parallel

Right now there is a guy at our house who is working on finishing the walls of our basement. A few minutes ago I got a tickle in my throat and right before I cleared my throat the man cleared his throat, so once I did it it was an echo of his. Then a few minutes later I went to clear my throat again and it happened exactly like before. Then, best of all, I was just sitting here and I accidentally breathed saliva down my trachea and started coughing, and at exactly the same time I coughed, he did too. So weird.

I am going to the Macon Georgia mission and I'll be speaking Spanish. I leave Sep. 26.

ocd

I have developed this compulsive thing where every time I go somewhere I want to pet my wiener dogs just in case it is the last time I ever see them.

Kickball

Last night my friend Ian who is 16 came to skateboard at my miniramp and brought a bunch of his 16 year old friends. I organized a game of kickball and at first everyone was skeptical but after about five minutes it was a hit. The game didn't start until about 11 so it was dark and we had to make some special rules so the game would run smoothly in the barnyard.

- No such thing as out of the park home runs.
- No fouls.
- (If playing with less than 4 people on a team) No ghost runners--one person must always be up to kick. If not, you're out!
- To score you must slide into home--no exceptions!
- If the ball that you kick bounces off the ceiling, rafters, wall, or other barnyard machinery and hits you, you are out. You have to be agile enough to dodge the ball that you kick.
- Intentionally kicking a ball to the left is an automatic out. Kicking to the left sends the ball into the neighbor's yard which, in the dark, makes it impossible to retrieve in time to smoothly play kickball.

A highlight of the night came when I was running from second to third and decided to hurdle over the two hay bales by third base instead of slowing down to go around them. We were using pieces of cardboard as the bases and as I jumped the cardboard slipped and I plowed straight into the hay bales at full speed. The hay bales went rolling and I landed on my back and someone threw the ball and it hit the top of my head. I'm out.

I also ripped a giant hole in the crotch of my pants sometime during the game. Which possibly could have made the high school girls present a little uncomfortable, plus I was wearing briefs so I was showing a lot of skin, but, the game had to go on anyway. It probably happened when I was sliding into home. Sliding into home always got hay leaves down your pants and kicked up dust which got in your mouth and eyes but that added to the fun of it.

bon jovi vs shania twain

This conversation just took place:

Dad: It came with a DVD?
Mom: Yes, so we not only get to listen to Bon Jovi but we get to see him too.
Dad: Is he nice for you to look at?
Mom: Yeah.

30 seconds pass while the DVD starts playing.

Dad: Well then I want one of Shania Twain. (He starts laughing.)
Mom: Well go right on ahead. I think she's kind of trashy myself.
Dad: Yeah, she is kind of trashy, but she's a pretty lady.

Then the conversation drifted off about how Shania Twain went too far and ruined her career.

bon jovi

My mom pre-ordered the new Bon Jovi cd and it came in the mail today. She got her boombox-like-thing out and she put it in while we were eating dinner. I would dare say that music while eating dinner is one thing that has never before happened in the Skinner household. But then she ended up turning it off after one song, which was kind of disappointing, because I thought the whole thing was great.

Tonight I went on a bike ride. I took my iPod and I loved every second of it. I rode on this dirt road that goes through these trees while "Our Hell" by Emily Haines played and it was the perfect accompaniment. Perfect tempo, perfect mood. Match made in heaven. It felt like I should have been in a movie. Then after I rode to the end of the dirt road I turned around and rode back downhill at top speed. At one point I had to swerve in and out of potholes and it was awesome. Then I was enjoying myself so much instead of turning to go home I just kept riding and Patrick Wolf came on as I triumphantly rode down main street of Bedford, WY on my flashy orange women's Western Flyer bike. Then I rode to the cemetery and sat with my back on my brother's gravestone while I caught my breath. Then I rode home. It was probably one of the most enjoyable things I've done in Wyoming since being here. That's how great it was.

Sometimes my brain will feel like the gas gets jammed open and it goes at full throttle and everything is flying out of control because it's going so fast and I can hardly concentrate on anything because my mind jumps from one thing to the next to the next and to the next.

Right now it is like that.

ADD?

Sometimes I wonder if I could find the one single person on this Earth that looks more like me than any other person if they would look like my twin, or if they'd only slightly resemble me. I also wonder if it's possible to find someone that you are not related to at all that would look more like you than your family members.

Both of those sentences were really awkward but I couldn't think of a better way to say them.

Owen Ashworth

I drew this on my graffiti wall on facebook, but I liked it so I wanted to show it off here too.

Part of me really hopes that people will notice that thing that announces your friends' birthdays on Facebook when you first login and I will receive a slew of happy birthday comments.

sunscreen

I hate the feeling of sunscreen and sunblock when you first put them on.

Lennie

I am terrible at the concept of leaving while you still want more. I usually tend to suck things completely dry and then move onto the next thing. Food, music, whatever. If I like a food I usually keep eating it until I'm sick to my stomach and never want to eat food again. I find a song I really like and then I'll wear it out in two days. If I have a puppy I will accidentally kill it. Just kidding! But in a metaphorical sense I'm not kidding.

Since being in Wyoming I've noticed that I have been "zipping up the sleeping bag of myself" almost all of the time. I think a lot of times I give people a watered-down version of my personality. Especially people in Wyoming; especially my parents. I don't know why I do this, or why I've always done it, but I don't want to do it anymore. If I am happy, I will be happy and I'll tell people why I'm happy. If I am sad, I will be sad and I'll tell people why I'm sad. If someone asks me what I like to do for fun I'm going to tell them exactly what I like to do for fun. No more diluted personality.

"I'm gonna bury my feelings deep inside me." "What do you mean, bury your feelings?" "No matter how much I feel, I'm not going to let it out. If I have to cry, I'm gonna cry on the inside. If I have to bleed, I'll bruise. If my heart starts going crazy, I'm not gonna tell everyone in the world about it. It doesn't help anything. It just makes everyone's life worse." "But if you're burying your feelings deep inside you, you won't really be you, will you?"

a beautiful day in the neighborhood

I just found this article about Mr. Rogers. He was a really great guy.

http://www.mentalfloss.com/blogs/archives/5943?rss

middle name

Today I felt inspired to start using my middle name more frequently. I'm going to do it. From here on out I'm Dallin Noel Skinner.

rant

This whole post is like my mind threw up on the page and none of it landed in any organized way and most thoughts are not completed.


Star Valley, or maybe all small towns, have such a strange culture. Well maybe I can't make that generalization about the whole culture, but the culture that surrounds manual labor jobs. There is this certain personality that is commonly found in these types of jobs.

First off, they act, or perhaps believe, that everything is a matter of common sense, and they were blessed with more common sense than anyone else. They are very quick to criticize the actions of others, most times because someone did something differently than the way they would have done it, and in their mind their way is the best and what other people did makes no sense to them, so by default they must be unskilled, stupid, etc. They don't even attempt to understand what sort of logic another person may have followed to bring them to that action. It just works like this:

if "their way" ≠ "my way"
then "their way" = faulty

Life has way too much variety for this logic to be worth anything. If anything is faulty, it is this logic.

They know nothing because they (think) they know everything.

Second, to these people anyone from Utah or California is automatically unintelligent.
look up on wikipedia:
bandwagon effect - is the observation that people often do (or believe) things because many other people do (or believe) the same.
group attribution error - Group members are more likely to attribute a fellow group member's actions to their arbitrary circumstances, while attributing a non-group member's actions to something in that group's inherent disposition.

Suddenly I just got really sick of writing this. I almost deleted it and then decided to just post what I have.

I find myself getting really annoyed at people who criticize other people because they are different than they are. Let people be dress how they want to dress. Let people do what they want to do. Let people be what they want to be. If it's different from you this doesn't make anyone else weird or gay or whatever ridiculous insults you can come up with. If someone is different from you just realize you have different tastes, and there's nothing wrong with that. So let them go their way and you go yours and then shut up.

Now I'm just rambling.

getting ready for bed

I will never not hate getting ready for bed.

bizarre

This is so weird.

terrible joke

Yesterday on the plane the guy sitting in the seat behind me told a "joke" that had the worst punchline. I don't know if it could even be considered a joke, because it just didn't work as a joke. It was more of a story that he tried to convert to a joke but it didn't really convert that well.

George Washing Gives Speech on "The American Way"!

George Washington (pictured above) explains how in America, "we put boots in people's asses." Afterwards the constitution was amended to include this line, along with a checklistlist of people to "give hell".

growth

If I could grow 6 - 8 inches on my mission I could come back and be a TOTAL BABE.

love my laptop

This morning I had the most noticeable reaction to painkillers than I have in the past few days. Which is weird because right after I was taking two at a time but now I only take one when it starts to hurt. I took one this morning and later I was sitting on the couch with my laptop thinking about how much I loved my laptop and computers and technology. Then I got up and felt dizzy, but the kind of floaty relaxing dizzy. It has wore off now and I sort of have a headache. I still love my laptop, just not as much as before.

wisdom

Tomorrow I get my wisdom teeth out. This will be my first time being put to sleep. And the first time to ever have any pain killers that are more than Tylenol.

To further clarify

That last entry was a joke. That is not what I meant by the Bruce Wayne analogy. Tomorrow I think I'm going to make a Bruce Wayne stencil.

My bladder is the biggest enemy to my sleeping habits.

My man-boobs have become firm pectoral muscles. This is what you get when you carry big rocks as a job. That, and cashmoney!

To clarify...

What I meant by that last entry is that when I leave Wyoming I am going to BURN THE PLACE DOWN!!!!! Hi-yaaa!

dallin begins

Being at home is not so bad anymore. Granted, I miss all of my friends, but it is bearable now. Now I don't feel so much like I'm at boot camp. I feel more like Bruce Wayne in Batman Begins when he goes to the mountains to train at the League of Shadows. When I'm done I'll be back and better than ever.

faces

Sometimes it is funny to look in the mirror and pull faces until you can't even recognize yourself and then contemplate what life would be like if you actually looked like that. Then it's also fun to create a personality for the various faces that you make.

Vacuums

When I'm vacuuming with a hose I can't help but suck up things that aren't mean to be sucked up by vacuums. I do this solely for entertainment. I've always done it. Sometimes you get the hose clogged and you have to fish it out with a hanger or something. Just barely I couldn't resist sticking the hose into a box of baking soda. It made a small windstorm.

packaged up

Like the hot-headed fury that smashed white knuckles against a two-toned gray frustration that comes from inconsistency. Just work, damn it.

Attach

Sometimes I can get really attached to people I don't even know that well. Sometimes I don't feel any attachment at all to people I know really really well. I don't understand this.

"I don't care what they say," he thought fiercely, and his vision
blurred as he flew out toward the Far Cliffs. "There's so much more to
flying than just flapping around from place to place! A... a... mosquito
does that! One little barrel roll around the Elder Gull, just for fun, and
I'm Outcast! Are they blind? Can't they see? Can't they think of the glory
that it'll be when we really learn to fly?
"I don't care what they think. I'll show them what flying is! I'll be
pure Outlaw, if that's the way they want it. And I'll make them so
sorry..."
The voice came inside his own head, and though it was very gentle, it
startled him so much that he faltered and stumbled in the air.
"Don't be harsh on them, Fletcher Seagull. In casting you out, the
other gulls have only hurt themselves, and one day they will know this,
and one day they will see what you see. Forgive them, and help them to
understand."

people

When someone invites me to hang out, I usually care more about what people I will be with more than I care about what we're doing. In fact, most of the time I don't care at all what we are doing, but how much I want to go depends on how much I like the people.

a scene that would only take place in the BYU dorms

Every Sunday morning the first counselor in the Elder's Quorum Presidency goes around to every door at 8:30 and wakes everyone up if they're not already awake and then tells them "Half hour 'til church." Today at 8:30 I had already showered and I was standing there wearing only my gym shorts and my white collared shirt and my hair was still wet and the parts that were dry were sticking out very frizzily. The first counselor walked in and saw me and said, "Yeaaaaaaaahhh" and then he might have said "that's what I'm talking about" but I don't remember for sure, but I think he did. Then he said, "You look sharp." In my head I said, "No I don't."

where everybody knows your name, and they're always glad you came (?)

Tonight at the hospital the man wrote down my name on the receipt after I had ordered and I didn't tell it to him. Then later when I walked up to get more barbecue sauce he said, "Yes, Dallin?" I don't know why he knows my name. I don't even remember anyone say my name before we ordered or anything. Weird. There was also this lady who cursed under her breath when she saw us walk in. Just like Cheers.

it's hard to be a human being

Sometimes I just get sick of having emotions. Sometimes I wish I could just not feel anything, or just feel entirely happy and content all the time. Alcohol anyone? (Joke!)

booger

I think that booger eating has become blown out of proportion. While picking your nose and eating it isn't necessarily something that is enticing to do, I don't think it's as gross as we have made it seem. When you spit loogies doesn't the exact same substance pass through your mouth anyway? It's just going in a different direction. I'm not saying that mucus in your mouth isn't gross, I'm just saying that when you stop think about it, eating your boogers really isn't that gross.

thoughts

I sometimes have the weirdest thoughts when I am half-awake, half-asleep. It is sometimes hard to explain them. It is like I have a random thought but I believe it is true. Or I reminisce about something that happened that didn't really happen. A good example is that one time I started falling asleep in seminary and I started thinking about going to work and that I didn't know how to work the oven. But then I realized that I didn't have an oven at work and I didn't have to use an oven in any way. I was a clerk for a video rental store. When my mind realized this then I woke up. This is an example that is easy to explain, but this is a pretty normal one. A lot of times they are much more bizarre, which creates very interesting things because my brain triggers real emotions. Just barely I was watching The Prestige and I started getting tired and started to fall asleep and then I started reminiscing about this time that I died (obviously I never died). It was kind of disturbing.

Birthing

Having babies is such a weird thing if you stop and think about it. There is one person/animal/camel and then another person/animal/camel comes out of the inside of them. In anthropology we watched a movie of a camel giving birth and it struck me as so weird. There was also a part of the movie where we saw a kid's bare pee-pee.

Love

"Most people see the problem of love primarily as that of being loved, rather than that of loving, of one's capacity to love. Hence the problem to them is how to be loved, how to be lovable. In pursuit of this aim they follow several paths. One, which is especially used by men, is to be successful, to be as powerful and rich as the social margin of one's position permits. Another, used especially by women, is to make oneself attractive, by cultivating one's body, dress, etc. Other ways of making oneself attractive, used both by men and women, are to develop pleasant manners, interesting conversation, to be helpful, modest, inoffensive. Many of the ways to make oneself lovable are the same as those used to make oneself successful, "to win friends and influence people." As a matter of fact, what most people in our culture mean by being lovable is essentially a mixture between being popular and having sex appeal. . . . And, maybe, here lies the answer to the question of why people in our culture try so rarely to learn this art, in spite of their obvious failures: in spite of the deep-seated craving for love, almost everything else is considered to be more important than love: success, prestige, money, power -- almost all our energy is used for the learning of how to achieve these aims, and almost none to learn the art of loving."

"One needs to be the latest model oneself, but one then has a right also and a duty to fall in love with the latest model. That can be put as crudely as it was put by a boy of eighteen who was asked what the ambition of his life was. He said he wanted to buy a better car; he wanted to change from a Ford to a Buick so that he could pick up a better class of girls. Well, this boy was at least frank, but I think he expressed something that, in a more subtle way, determines the choice of partners in our culture." - Erich Fromm

This pretty much sums up my feelings of dating and how it is approached in mainstream culture. People spend too much energy trying to act in a certain way and follow a bunch of petty, ridiculous rules that supposedly will make others like them and spend no energy on being genuine and sincere.

God

I wonder if people's perceptions of God are impacted by their parent's parenting style. It would make sense to me. If you had parents who were strict disciplinarians it seems like you would tend to view God in that way. But if your parents were more of the type that is not as strict and more supportive and open then you probably tend to view God in that way. I'm sure there are exceptions but I bet this is true for a lot of people.

"Our heavenly Father is more liberal in His views, and boundless in
His mercies and blessings, than we are ready to believe or receive. .
. . God does not look on sin with [the least degree of] allowance, but
. . . the nearer we get to our heavenly Father, the more we are
disposed to look with compassion on perishing souls; we feel that we
want to take them upon our shoulders, and cast their sins behind our
backs." - Jeffrey R. Holland quoting Joseph Smith

I started thinking about this because someone hung up a sign in the bathroom stall that has a list of things that you feel when you have the spirit and a list of things that you feel when you don't have the spirit. The last one on the having the spirit side said, "you realize that your thoughts and your actions are open to God." I would disagree with this one. At least for me. I have always felt that my thoughts and actions were open to God, but at the same time, I would much rather God see my thoughts than anyone else, even if it's a string of f-words, the reason being that he would have a much better understanding of the circumstances and context of whatever I'm thinking. But then I started wondering if other people don't have that same view. Especially at BYU I've noticed people who seem to think of God as a very critical, strict disciplinarian. I feel like that view makes God very distant, unapproachable, and pretentious.

Hunger = Instability

I can get so crazy when I get really hungry. Sometimes if I'm feeling really depressed or frustrated or angry I realize that I'm really hungry. Then if I eat something I am fine again. Or other times I will be doing something that I really love to do but I will find that I am just not enjoying it. Then I will realize I am hungry.

I think a lot of people don't believe me when I try to tell them this. I think it has something to do with reactive hypoglycemia.

Ewwww

In anthropology the teacher said, "domestication of animals" and then someone behind me said, "ewwwww"


and then in my head I said, "what?"

Buy Cheap Phentermine Penis Enlargement!

Last night I was looking at my dad's website and I found this line sneakily hanging out on the very bottom of the page.

Buy XenicalBuy Xanax Buy Phentermine mp3 players Buy Phentermine mp3 player Buy Cheap Phentermine Penis Enlargement Cialis Buy Cialis

I don't know how this got there. It is funny that this would happen to my dad, but for some reason it seems like it fits, as in it's something that would happen to him. He gets more junk mail than anyone I know and it's all about this same above stated subject matter.

I will call him later when he gets off work so I can fix it.

Reflections of Dorm Life

Here is a picture of me when I was sick and I didn't feel very good.

I have to write a paper and it's 2 a.m. I hate writing papers. It has become one of the hardest things for me to do since being in college. It takes me so long to finally get started and it takes me so long to painstakingly crank it out. Usually it comes to a point where it's due the next day and it's late and I'm tired and I think, I don't care if it sucks I'm just going to do it and at least get some points. But usually the paper isn't that bad.

Some days I feel so emotionally exhausted. I cannot wait until the dorm life portion of my life is over. I have learned to live with it but I still don't like it. I think the main reason is that I can't handle people. All through high school I had gotten used to doing my own thing in peace and quiet most of the time. I miss having those breaks. Sometimes I got lonely, but there is a balance between time spent with others and time spent alone. I was more content with life back then.

Sometimes I can't stand aspects mainstream culture. Example: the idea that guys are only friends with girls they would date. Stupid, stupid, stupid! STUPID! I hate that idea, and it has absolutely no foundation, other than the fact that males are socialized into such a ridiculous idea. Another thing that bothers me: the approach that people take to romantic relationships. It seems to me that there is this distance between males and females in relationships that is created because it is viewed as just a game. (A game when taken in the context of BYU has eternal consequences.) It feels like people aren't connecting with themselves and others. One day I saw a poster for a "Healthy Relationship Conference" hanging in the Wilkinson Center. One of the classes was entitled, "You tricked me but that's OK." It made me angry. Well I guess once you are married then there is not a lot you can do but learn to live with it, so there is a place for that kind of class; however, I feel that there should be a class teaching people how to stop treating marriage like a game or a conquest and to start being honest with themselves and others, so they don't have to trick people. I hate it when people show more loyalty to their friends than their girlfriend and/or boyfriend. For one, I don't feel that's the right way to approach a relationship, and two, I don't think caring friends should try to demand more loyalty, they should give you your space if you need it. I think if friends were actually observant and caring they would recognize that and just let you have your space, not selfishly try to bend you to their will. Mainstream male culture would call me a "Hoes before Bros" guy, and I guess you're right, but mainstream male culture can go to hell.

One other thing, I am so thankful to have the roommate that I have. There are some people who live on my floor that would drive me absolutely crazy. In fact they do drive me crazy, but if they were roommate it would be unbearable. He is funny, he is nice, and he isn't overbearing.

Sometimes I am afraid that I don't entirely communicate my ideas and people read them and get the wrong idea. I am afraid that people might get that feeling from this. Oh well.

Killer

Holy cow.

Anti-life

In contrast to my last post, sometimes I see people doing things and I lose all faith and hope in humanity and I think, "I'm sick of living on this earth with these people."

I felt like this today. Once this morning with a total jerk in the Cannon Center and once a few hours ago outside in the parking lot while I was riding my skateboard.

Life

Sometimes I see people and suddenly I feel so happy about life and I am happy to be alive doing what I'm doing and happy that they are alive doing what they're doing. Today when I saw an old man with a long beard and a fuzzy hat riding his bike down the street it made me feel this way. The man looked exhausted and he didn't necessarily look happy but it made me happy to see him riding his bike. Ah life!

Dallin and the Perverts Den

Tonight was pretty fun. I should have stayed home and slept and rested and worked on homework, but instead I went to this dance party that my friend Hillery invited me to. I took some Western Family style Dayquil and danced my heart out. My lungs started burning and all of my muscles ached but it was really fun. My friend Dan, who lives on my floor came with me. Then some other kids who lived on my floor showed up and talked me into going to this other party. I suspected that I wasn't going to like it. And I was right.

It sucked. Sucked so bad. Everyone was just standing around and those who were "dancing" were just, for the most part, dry humping each other. The music was quiet and it was this really slow hip hop. (I don't mean to sound elitist) but everyone there was the kind of kids who think they're cool but aren't really cool. (But I guess in a mainstream MTV kind of world maybe they are cool?) There was probably someone there who I'd actually really like and really get along with. I shouldn't write off all of the people there. I couldn't really see anyone in the dark. But it was just a reminder of why I like the people I like and why I like the things I do. Also, there was a whole lot of stomping going on at the first dance party, and no stomping at the second.

So I decided to leave the sucky party and go back to the first one, but on my way there I forgot to turn on my lights and I passed a police officer and got picked up. I felt like he was trying to accuse me of something. He asked where I came from and where I was going. I felt the pressure of his questions and I kind of started stumbling with what I was saying and then I was afraid that he was suspicious I was trying to hide something. Then I got a ticket because of my headlight. But if I fix it and take it to the police station then it will go away.

When I got back to the fun party my body felt so achy and tired that I ended up just leaving. And now it still feels like that and I really need to go to bed and I'm afraid I'm going to be even sicker tomorrow because I exhausted myself and I have to wake up at 8 a.m. for church.

Oh yeah, and I bought the new camera and I took these pictures throughout the night.

New Camera!

After my last post I was inspired to look at digital cameras. I found out that Best Buy is having a sale right now on digital cameras. I found one with good reviews and is pretty inexpensive and will work for my purposes. I am going to go buy it (I will have relatively no money left from my job at the pita pit) as soon as my pants get done drying.

Maybe I should just go in my swimming suit. I have been wearing it because I had no underwear. The swimming suit has got the underwear built right in! And I can wipe my wet hands on it and it dries quick. I should just wear a swimming suit all of the time.

There is part of me that thinks it would be exciting/liberating to go to Best Buy in a swimming suit, but there is part of me that thinks it would be silly.

I Made a Blog

I am getting sick today. My head hurts and it hurts a lot to cough. And I feel achy.

A few weeks ago, as a joke, I found this random girl on Facebook from some random college and added her as a friend. Then I was going to say I was in a relationship with her, and hope that she approved it. But she never even approved our friendship. Shot down.

My digital camera is completely broken. Otherwise I would post pictures of what I did last night. I could also scan them with my friend's scanner but right now I don't feel like going through the bother of getting the drivers, etc. Maybe later.